Rest Already!

Matthew 11:28-30

28Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
29Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
30For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

This passage is so true. I was just sitting here and verse 30 popped into my head as I was reflecting on the events of the past two days. Things got a little scary for me, I'll spare you the details, but I surrendered it all to God completely and it's already so much better! God's presence and guidance is so peaceful. Lately I've been feeling like He's wanted me to "rest" but I didn't know what He meant or how to do it. This verse shows me that surrendering all to Him is a form of rest and that's what He meant. I love revelations! Haha! He totally meant that my soul wasn't resting and I was overthinking this and trying to figure it all out by myself. He didn't mean a literal physical rest... that's why I was confused because I haven't done much of anything lately because I'm just at home, doing nothing... until 2 weeks when I leave for summer project.

Anywhos. That's all. Life is good. Rob and I have been together for 6 months and I love him more than ever. :-) Things are going good for us and God is working through us. It'll be cool to see what God does with us once I leave. I think it'll be all good.

That's all for now.

Attacks...

Being on the front lines of spiritual warfare sucks. I've felt that I have been on them a lot lately, because I have been rekindling the romance in my life with Jesus AND I'm going to do the Lord's work in a few weeks, so the enemy really has it out for me and is attacking the most sensitive areas of my life.

Roger Webb, the revivalist/evangelist who came to our church a few weeks ago came back today for the Sunday service. He said when you're in the storm to keep your eyes on the Lord and not the enemy... maybe that's my problem. I'm so busy fighting under God's authority, but I'm not always focused on Him as much as I am the enemy and defeating him. Yes, the enemy is a target and must be defeated, but every knee shall bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord! I don't need to fight for Him, the battle's already won. I just need to know my place and keep my eyes fixed on Him... like a child learning how to walk, they keep their eyes on mommy or daddy and make their way straight to them. Sometimes they stumble a little, but they are determined to make it. When Jesus' calmed the storm in Mark 4 He asked the disciples if they had no faith. He didn't understand why they were afraid when God in the flesh was on the boat and just chillin. Nothing is different now. It seems like I've been trying to do to much, change to much and I just need to receive when the Lord wants to give me and just let Him do it already! Who knew it could be so hard to just receive... lol. I don't need to do anything but ask most of the time. If He needs me to do something, He'll tell me.

God been talking to me a lot lately and showing me things. He's been answering my prayers when I intercede for people, especially for my summer project group. It's just been awesome. God is so good and wonderful. There's no way that I'm going to give up and stop persevering. Nehemiah 8:10 says that the joy of the Lord will be our strength. Nehemiah wouldn't have said that if we wouldn't need the joy of the Lord and if we didn't need strength, which means following God isn't easy and through the valleys we need to remember what the Lord has done and take great joy in that. We need to remember the deposits He has put in us in the past and draw on those. When He tells you something, gives you something, imparts something, He doesn't take that deposit away and He wants you to continue to withdraw from that in the future. We need to hold on because breakthrough could (and probably is) right around the corner.

As always please keep me in your prayers right now... God is good, but the fight is tough. I can't wait to get to Australia and be over the "getting there" hurdle and onto the fight for souls for God's kingdom! :-) Then my hands will get really dirty!!! haha.

Hannah's Barreness

I finished the 1st Chapter of "Prophetic Evangelism" last night and one (of the many) eye opening point really caught my attention. Desperation. We need to be desperate for Jesus. And I don't mean wishy-washy only sometimes need Him desperate, I'm talkin hardcore desperate! The example the author used was from First Samuel 1. Hannah's (mother of Samuel) womb had been closed up by the Lord. Hannah was the wife of Elkanah, but he had another wife, Peninah, who was a baby making machine. This provoke Hannah and made her want children even more. Elkanah increased the amount of blessing he gave Hannah and even said "Am I not worth more than ten sons?". This whole bargain deal didn't slow Hannah down. So she got desperate and prayed and fasted before the Lord. She then made a covenant with the Lord, that if He opened her womb, she would dedicate Samuel's life to Him. So the Lord opened her womb and she bore Samuel.
I agree when the author says that God more than likely used Peninah's over-active baby maker to draw something out of Hannah. The same could be said about our possible spiritual barrenness! I know when I see someone else who is spiritually fruitful, I wonder if I'm doing something wrong and I feed of off that sort of thing. I think God let's certain things provoke us so that we get desperate and run to Him with questions and for help. Hannah was so determined!
The author suggests that there are 4 stages of desperation.
Stage 1) Awareness: This is when you first realize something is missing, but at this stage, you more than likely have little to no motivation to figure it out, let alone fix it.
Stage 2) Embarrassment: This stage is when we feel a slight negative feeling about what we are lacking. We see what other people have and are self-conscious about what we are not doing.
Stage 3) Frustration: When that nagging feeling is consistently present. You start to get more distressed about your situation, but many people who get to this stage do not push through and never make any change.
Stage 4) Intolerability: This is when the above feelings release an "momentous change". You get to the point where you can no longer go against the feelings. Desperation like this releases fresh intimacy, inspiration and a much needed impact. Change will not occur without a high sense of urgency! This desperation can be looked at as a divine way that Christ is trying to make you go one step further.

All of that makes a lot of sense to me and has shed some light on why I feel the way I do sometimes. This was only the last 4 pages of the chapter. There were so many other awesome and encouraging things in the first chapter, but this is one I though I should share and dive into deeper. :-)

The Valley of Dry Bones

So I started to read the book I got yesterday called "Prophetic Evangelism: Empowering a Generation to Seize Their Day" by Sean Smith. I just finished the prologue... yeah, I know, exciting, right? haha. Well it had a good amount of info in it that I need to process so I'm going to do that here.

After reading the prologue once, I decided to read Ezekiel 37 in it entirety so I could really understand the full version. After doing so I re-read the prologue and grasped everything a lot better! God was showing Ezekiel the dry bones and asked "Son of man, can these bones live?" And Ezekiel's reply was like "Only you can pull off that one big guy!" So Ezekiel seemed to realize the impossibility of himself trying to make these bones live again. He knew no matter what he said or did as a man would do nothing to these bones. So God tells Him what to say and do under God's authority! So he tells the bones what God said and the bones came back to life. Ezekiel become an "divine agent for 'dead' humanity". God could have brought the bones back to life without using Ezekiel, but He DESIRED to use Ezekiel as a vessel for His grand plan! In John 5:19-20 Jesus says
"...I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does. For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does. Yes, to your amazement he will show him even greater things than these". God wants us to get with the program, jump on board, join in on what He's doing and pay attention to what the Holy Spirit is saying and pointing out specifically! We can't do anything without our Heavenly Father, so why even try to? We should be abiding in Him and being more focused on growing His Kingdom!

I highly recommend that you read Ezekiel 37 if you haven't recently. It is a great example of Prophetic Evangelism and just all around inspiring!

Final Round

Christ’s Power – Acts 1:8
Do you experience the power of the Spirit for witness?

(8) But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth."

I think I can tell when the Spirit urges me to talk to someone. And whenever the Spirit does this He gives me the right words. I know that He is in control and that He will tell me what to do. I went shopping today and picked up a book about prophetic evangelism which sounds pretty sweet and I'm excited to start reading a little bit. I hope it'll help me listen to God more when it comes to evangelism and to be able to identify divine appointments in advance. With the power of the Spirit, anything is possible! I have yet had the opportunity to lead someone to Christ and I really hope that God will use me that way in Australia. I know I'll be sharing there, I would just really love to lead people to Him and be able to keep in contact with a new brother or sister in Christ. I can't wait to experience the adventures for this summer...

Round 3

Round 3
Christ’s Plan – Matthew 28:18-20
Do you embrace the Great Commission?

(18) Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. (19) Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, (20) and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

So the big question... do I embrace this passage? Kinda...? I mean I totally understand what it means... Jesus commanded us to go share the gospel with EVERYONE! Not just in foreign countries, but even in our hometowns. I think lately I've been stuck in the rut of, 'Well I'll do my part in Australia this summer' and just kind of ignoring my responsibility to this passage until then. It's not easy for me right now because I'm not working much at all... I just basically go to church and that's about as much excitement as I get. BUT I do have old high school friends that I could be inviting to church. And we had a revival meeting about a week ago and I invited people, but it was short notice which made things difficult. I should be praying for more opportunities... heck even just with my family. My dad's side is not as spiritual as my mom's side... but they are just so hard to talk to about anything at all! I am totally pumped and prepared to go share the gospel when I'm in Australia... I really should be praying more about RIGHT NOW! Practicing now would be amazing preparation for Australia. I need to pray for more wisdom and boldness I think. More zeal. It's been pretty easy to grow stagnit in some areas since I'm stuck at home, but at the same time this is the perfect opportunity to spend lots of alone time with God. For as many times as I've heard or read this passage, it amazes me how convicting and powerful it is!

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In other news...

Rob left for New Staff Training today. I didn't think I'd get to talk to him today, but I was pleasantly surprised to have my cell phone wake me up from my nap. I got to talk to him for a little over a half hour when he was on his way to pick up the guy he's carpooling with. I'm so excited for him! He's going to be playing drums for the worship team down there, which is really cool! I can't wait to see what God does with Him over the next month and a half! In just the past week I've seen strong, spiritual growth in him and in the relationship! God's def. doing something. :)

At midnight, I have only 25 days until I leave for Australia! It's so insane. I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster... and the rollercoaster experience for me means that the slow, clicking to the top is nerve racking and all I want to do is get off the coaster, but I know that I can't turn back now... and at the same time I don't want to, I just want to get to the top already so that the anticipation goes away and I can experience the free fall and the awesome twists and turns. This rollercoaster is one the requires my legs to be dangling... which is a very terrifying but fun feeling for me! haha. It's more vulnerable. Also, on the way to the top, I don't look around (mostly because I'm terrified of heights)... this aspect can be positive, because it means I'm focusing on the goal and God, but at the same time, I'm not looking around at the other possibilities. That pretty much explains it. Don't get me wrong at all--I am so excited to go... I just want to get rid of this nervous energy and be there already! :)

Round 2

Christ’s Passion – Matthew 9:35-38
Do you have compassion for the lost?

(35) Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. (36) When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. (37) Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. (38) Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field."

I think sometimes my compassion for the lost is only surface level. I don't think this attitude is intentional. It's like when you see those commercials for orphans that are always sad and depressing, but then you get distracted and kind of forget about them. I think I can be a little compassion ADD, if you will. My heart DOES break for the lost, but when it comes to doing something, I'm scared, too busy, or just plain lazy. I need to start working towards being one of the workers in this plentiful harvest. People ARE hungry. People ARE lost and they ARE looking for something to fill the void in their heart. So many times they turned to the wrong things, how many of those times was it possible for us, as the workers, to possibly prevent some of that? I know I need to make more of a conscious effort.

I'm so excited that this summer I'll be somewhat forced to learn to deal with my fear and laziness when it comes to talking to people. It's really hard for me to maintain friendships. I've been burned a lot in the past with friends who only want to talk and not listen. They ended up sucking the life out of me. It's a stronghold I need to get past because not everyone is going to do that to me and I need to give people a chance before I label them. I really hope that my friendship building skills grow a lot this summer and I'll kind of learn how to do that all over again. I know that I have friends now that would be here for me in a heartbeat. Sometimes I just have a hard time realizing it.

Anyways... that was a really random tangent at the end. Isn't it fun when God leads you to a passage to make you realize something else in the chain of events of your mind? lol.

A little sidenote.

This is my address and the place I'm staying in Australia.
42 Denison St.
Newcastle NSW 2303

Our hostel: newcastlebackpackers.com

Seeing the hostel got me more excited about going. We're just a few blocks from the beach too, I'm really excited to spend time with God by the ocean... it was so much fun to do that during Spring Break, so I'm ready to do it again for sure!

:)

Prayer for Australia Summer Project

Along with the homework my project director sent, here are some things me and my team will be praying about this week. If you could, even right now, pray for some of these things, it would be greatly appreciated!

• Pray that my team would be followers of Christ and look more and more like him, that his purpose would be our purpose, his passion our passion, his plan our plan and his power our power.
• Pray for our financial needs. We’re at about 60% of what we need as a team. Let’s ask and trust the Lord to provide the remaining 40% before my team gets on the plane in July! God has called my team to physically go to Australia this summer, and he has called others to be involved through sacrificing financially to send us.
  
  

My project director gave us some homework. :)

So for the next four days I'll be going through a passage and writing thoughts here.

Round 1
Christ’s Purpose – John 17:1-5
Do you seek God’s glory first and foremost?

Jesus Prays for Himself

(1)After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed: "Father, the time has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. (2)For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. (3)Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. (4)I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do. (5)And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began".

This is a pretty powerful passage. Because Jesus died for our sins so we could spend eternity with God, we are Jesus' brothers and sisters and heirs to the Kingdom of God. As Christians He commands us to spread the good news! How many times do we pass up this opportunity? How many times do we ignore the stir in our spirit to talk to someone about Christ? And why? Because we're scared? Because we may be persecuted? Jesus says that we must pick up our cross and follow Him. For those of you who have seen The Passion of the Christ, I'm sure you can recall the image of Christ lugging His cross up a hill -- it was not an easy task! It sure wasn't comfortable. And we do not have it nearly as tough as He did -- I don't think any of us are sweating blood, literally or figuratively over a situation! We should have God glorifying lives 24/7/365. Yes, we are human, we screw up, but if God sees us making the effort He WILL bless us for it. I encourage you, no matter how bad things are, to go to Christ and make things right with Him. He can pull you out of ANY pit. Living in Christ, receiving His joy even when things seem to be falling apart... it's one of the trippyest things ever! When you flesh is freaking out, screaming, but your spirit is still and joyful... you know you're doing something right then! Christ's purpose was to be sacrificed so that we could spend eternity with our heavenly Father. And we should be multiplying and building UP the Kingdom of God while we are hear. Easier said then done?... perhaps. But when you are operating in the Holy Spirit BAM! anything can happen. Bask in His presence people... HE IS HERE! Soak in the glory of God and spread it all around!!!!

I am sooooo pumped for Australia! :-D

I'm such a slacker.

Sound I haven't blogged in a while... and I def. haven't been keeping up in Romans! AGH! I've been in the habit of starting a book and then starting another one... mostly Christian books. But now I'm reading a book called "A Sunburned Country"... it's about Australia and it's pretty funny.

But yeah... I need to get back into the word regularly! I don't think just looking at my facebook bible verse of the day is enough. Even though I haven't been in the word as much as I'd like, I have reconnected with God a lot in the past week. We had an evangelist that spent 35 day at the Lakeland Revival come to my church for two nights in a row (last Friday and Saturday) and it was amazing. People were healed of pain, hearing issues, etc. We also spent a large amount of time praising God and dancing and having fellowship. It was really amazing to feel a heavy presence of God and it was contagious. God really ministered to me the first night and I was "filled" with the spirit. (see Eph. 5:18). I let God take over again and He's been doing a huge work in me, which is good, but somewhat painful. So it's good to be at home and back at my church.

I saw Rob this past Sunday & Monday. It was fun, but now we have a little over 2 months until we see each other again. We both believe that God is separating us for a reason for this time period, but it's really hard. Rob leaves for New Staff Training on Monday and I'm really excited for him and a little jealous! He was talking about some of his texts books and it sounds like he's going to be learning a lot of cool stuff. I'm sure I'll be learning cool things too... which will be fun to talk about when we get back from our summer adventures!

I'm working on getting some sort of cell phone for when I'm in Australia, but it's such a pain. If I use nextel, it cost $1.29 a minute and if I go with a local Australian number I have to buy a phone & sim card... which will basically pay for itself in comparison to nextel. So I'm trying to figure that out (if anyone has any advice let me know...). It's frustrating and adding unneeded stress. I just really want to be able to talk to my family and Rob when I'm gone because I'll be lucky to get online once a week since we can't take laptops.

But other than that... things are good. A girl that I was training last week at my old workplace asked me how to know if she was saved... which she was and just needed to be pointed towards scripture. So that was cool... I didn't even bring it up. God is good. Things are a little rough but other people have it way worse than I do. I'm getting excited for Australia but I'm still nervous... like really nervous. But I know without a doubt that God wants me to go, so I will. :) I know this is a divine appointment in my life. I like to look at it like this: God is stealing me away from everyone I know, especially Rob, to take me to a country I've always wanted to go to, to use me to do His work AND to romance me at one of the most beautiful places I could imagine. So keep me in yours prayers friend... this blog was pretty random so I appreciate it if you made it all the way through. haha.

So...

I haven't blogged in a couple of days. Haven't read through Romans either. It's been a pretty busy week. I finished up my summer class (thank you Jesus!) and I've been in Rockford with Rob since Friday night. I'm still here. Rob ended up not having to work today so I got to stay an extra day. Friday we saw Prince Caspian and it was really freakin' cool!! I loved all the Christian connections and some of them were very powerful and sometimes tear jerking! I would totally recommend it if you haven't seen it yet. Saturday we went to Michigan's Adventures with Cru people and that was good and fun up until I feel down some slippery stairs in the water park, which gave me a headache, which made me naseuated (sp?) which put me out of commission the rest of the day -- but Rob and I rode Thunderhawk before we went to the waterpark so I was glad that I at least got to ride the new ride. We went to the beach after that and walked out to the pier and chilled and talked. Then we went to the Getty Drive-In and watched Iron Man. That was the first time I'd ever been to a drive in so it was good fun. Today we went canoing down the Rogue River for two hours -- that was a lot of fun. It was so pretty! Now we're just chillin... Rob's playing some video games and I'm catching up on other people's blogs.

Speaking of reading people's blogs... two of my fellow bloggers are aboard about their recent adventures is getting me excited and nervous about my own in a little over a month! I know God is going to take good care of me because He obviously wants me to go... support raising was almost too easy! lol. But I'm nervous about being away. It's only 6 weeks, but I know SO much is going to happen and that I'm going to grow and do things I've never done before and be places I've never dreamed of seeing before... it's going to be a great experience and I really wish I could shake this feeling of fear. Fear sucks... fear is from the Devil so that means he sucks too. As I'm typing this I'm looking at this eagle things on Rob's desk and it reminds me of Isaiah 40:27-31.

27 Why do you say, O Jacob, and complain, O Israel, "My way is hidden from the LORD; my cause is disregarded by my God"?

28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;

31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

So there is no doubt that God will sustain me on this trip. He's in control... He knows what's going to happen before, after and during this trip. He knows every single step that I am going to take... then why am I so worried? It's like I know this stuff in my mind but maybe my heart's not completely recieving it? I know it's normal to have some fear/anxiousness before something big like this, but He tells us not to have fear and not to be anxious... BAH! Haha... it's a little frustrating at times. Anywhos... I think I'm done verbally vomitting for today. :)